Ah, the question every one of our wedding clients seems to ask: “Should I do a first look?” And as much as I wish I could give you a magical answer, it’s just not possible!
The decision to do a first look or wait for the “aisle moment” has to be a personal call- and I’d never be able to tell someone which is the best fit for them. What I CAN do, however, is speak to my own experience- and I pray our thoughts will help you in deciding for yourself!
When Justin and I were engaged, I was team “aisle moment”, and he was team “first look”. Spoiler (if you couldn’t tell by the title): We did a first look. So, when you read these tips, you can do so with an open mind knowing I myself was converted into a first look fan! Below I’m giving you my five top reasons you should consider a first look:
1) You get to enjoy more time with your fiancé
I’m bringing ya this one first because honestly, it’s far and above the most important reason I converted to a first look!
During our engagement, I was counting the seconds until our wedding! I could hardly wait to talk to Justin about my dress, to see him all spiffed up, and to give him a huge hug and kiss on our WEDDING DAY! I realized without a first look, I wasn’t going to be seeing Justin until 5:00pm…. Basically I was spending 9 hours of our wedding day without him. When I thought about it like this, a first look was a no brainer! The day was about US, so I wanted an US for every moment possible!
Our first look allowed us to spend several hours together with each other, our families (because we did family photos before the ceremony), and our friends (just hanging out before the I do’s!). These hours were some of the most precious of the entire day, and looking back, I wouldn’t trade them for anything.
2) It calms the nerves
The thought of walking down the aisle all dressed up with 85 people looking made both Justin and I a little nervous. But no matter what life throws at us, being with Justin can instantly make me calm…. Something about having my person by my side makes everything ok! Do you feel like this with your own fiancé too? If so, it could be beneficial to consider a first look.
Doing our first look helped me feel so much more at ease walking down that aisle. In addition, it really took the pressure off Justin! There’s this whole “ Is he going to cry?” moment that hangs in the air at every wedding, and Justin could just process the ceremony without overthinking anything because he’d already been with me all afternoon!
3) More time with friends and family at cocktail hour
Our friends and family traveled near and far to be with us in the mountains of Georgia, and the last thing I wanted was to miss an hour of partying with them! If Justin and I hadn’t done a first look, our cocktail hour would have been spent taking pictures with family and each other. While I loved our portrait time, I’m so glad we were able to do it prior to our ceremony so we could spend more quality time with our nearest and dearest!
4) You’ll feel your emotions more deeply
Have you ever heard a bride say “you better cry or I’m turning around!” jokingly to her groom? Honestly, I probably said it during our engagement too. But truth be told- this was so much pressure for Justin. He’s not a very emotional guy- so why would it be ideal for him to actually let his walls down in front of 85 people?
During our first look, it was just Justin and me, our photographer, and our videographer (both of whom stood back quite a bit). It was private, personal, and one of the most unforgettable moments of my life. I wasn’t distracted by ceremony music, or looking out at a crowd, or anything else. It was just the two of us!
(And yes, he cried. No, I don’t think he would have if we waited for the aisle moment!)
5) You’ll have more time and light for wedding portraits
One big goal on our wedding day was relaxation. We never wanted to feel forced, or rushed, or stressed! Doing portraits before the ceremony was amazing because our photographer got to take his time and capture some epic portraits. He didn’t have to worry about the sun setting, or squeezing every picture into an hour, etc. He got to do what he did best in a location that was amazing because we had the time!
While I can’t give you the magic answer for if you should have a first look, I hope my own experience can help you process your own thoughts on the choice! No matter which option you choose, the moment you see your future spouse is sure to be a magical one.
Happy Planning!
Ashley
PS- If you’re loving the wedding inspiration you found here, you might like these ideas for a wedding day exit!
Ending the blog with an image from our very own first look. Remembering this moment makes me cry!
